Lap Dancing...not just for fun?

Okay, Dr. J.- I applaud the information and appreciate the insight from the Lap Dance Study in your earlier comment. Bravo, ladies-I love a stripper with an agenda. I mean, what occurs to me as I read the all-too scientific study of the ins and outs (ouch, the puns are coming fast here-dam, I did it again) of the lap dance fertility study is: well, duh. Did it really take a truly, well-organized, probably publicly funded, study run by an undeniably creative Rutgers student to tell us that strippers are hotter when ovulating? Women, help a girl out: do you guys not notice that we linger around the bedroom door on just a few nights a month? Did it occur to you that you wish we had this kind of fervor at any time other than during the Super Bowl? Did you think it was your cologne? I like football as much as the rest of the girls, but it wasn't the day we spent eating nachos on our sofa that got me to to come to bed without my underwear - obviously an oversight on my part. It was more likely the urge I get once a month to tear off the clothes of the nearest male I can get my hands on. Strippers are just girls like me, with a few DDDifferences (sorry for the stutter). Unlike the average American woman on the go, the go-go dancer has to worry about the lingering expiration of their eggs and their career. Every month, another egg down the hatch, another reminder that we only have so much time left to fertilize and tantalize. So, like a salesman on a monthly quota, the stripper seizes each passing egg with the fervor of a dying man. (or wo-man) You see, it's not as complicated as all the science would indicate. We know that when we are ovulating (i.e.: getting hot and bothered over a cover of Brad Pitt in the grocery store), the inevitable is next: the dreaded menstruation. To an average girl on the street, it's no big deal-we wear dark colors to feel less fat and our husbands spend more time online doing things we don't need to see. But that's about it. Strippers, well-to a stripper menstruation is temporary unemployment. Nobody wants to pay good money for a lap dance from a girl who has to wear her grandma's underwear to conceal the telltale signs of mother nature. So, all science aside: they have 8 days left to make the rent. So, out come the glass platforms and the extra naughty drawers. She is crossing her fingers for a bachelor party or a fraternity hazing and no man goes home with cash. Now you may need science to confirm that women are "attracting" men during ovulation as a function of physiology, but most strippers I know like girls (yes, I am quite popular with the ladies). So does the science explain why naked lesbians aren't throwing those pheromones to the ladies in the room? Maybe we aren't the ones with the wads in our pockets, or the loose grip on our dollars. Either way: work it, girl.