Saturday, October 6, 2007
The Maiden Voyage
The big bad world of blogging. I watch my geeky husband at his computer 24/7 and think: is he watching porn? what could be so engaging if not boobies? Blogging? you're kidding, right? He's posting to his blog, now defunct due to issues we can no longer discuss...lawyers sent us a letter, wagged their fingers for disrupting their solace in bourgeois Lebo-Land. If you're not from Pittsburgh-you just wouldn't understand. So, here I am trying to get my husband's attention and I figure-maybe he'll read my blog, look across the room, tear off my clothes and Bam!-blogging gets you laid! Yes, I said laid. You see, I am not trying to be a "real" journalist and I absolutely don't give a shit what anyone thinks. I take as good as I give-so feel free to let me know your thoughts (bigots and ignorants need not post). My co-author Meghan-she has trouble with the big words, so go easy. Penis, wiener, boobs, people: keep it simple. Oh, and we're thinking of doing Dildo Wednesdays: for those of you who don't know us: that's when we review a new model of self-pleasuring device. True story-don't wait 'til the next party to hear if the White Rabbit is worth the 3 D batteries, tune in Wednesday. Boys, don't be afraid to offer up any topics you'd like to get a woman's perspective on, we'll help you out wherever we can. BUT-this is not a space for dirty talk or finding Hookers or Happy Endings, just all the things you've always wanted to say to the PTA, and just couldn't get the words out. See you soon.
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4 comments:
Hmmm...I seem to remember it as the "MEGHAN and laura" show, but pregnancy makes your mind a little foggy, so given my weakened state, I'll defer to the big D on this one.
So trying to figure out how to post an entry, but so far I'm relegated to the world of "comments." We'll work out the kinks. My geeky husband has proposed "lubrication" Monday. Not a bad idea, since it's going to take some serious lube to get me going these days. Who ever said being pregnant made you hornier is a big fat liar pants. The word, "pants" by the way, makes everything funnier. Try it sometime. Call someone a "loser." Then, call them "loser pants." Funnier. Definitely. Fucker, then fucker pants. Liar, then liar pants. Pants and farts do in fact make everything funnier. The next meeting with your boss, just let one rip and watch the tension dissipate.
Back to me, in future entries, stay tuned for "When in doubt, sit: advice on food poisoning." And "How Laura has made half of Austin cry." Classics, but worth putting into print.
Thanks for playing everyone. Can't wait till Wednesday--maybe the dry spell will be over when I test the "egg."
I'm waiting for the Laura and Meghan take on this: Ovulating lap dancers make more tips.
Hey! I wanna get laid. How do join this blorgy? Heather Jo wants to know. Could it be The Laura & Meghan Show with occasional special guest HJ? I'd be like that scraggly muppet with the bent beak and the pointed suit collar. I'm celebrating a raucous Tube-Tie Tuesday with netfix and leftover pasta.
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